Hello, great to see you! Newcomers and longtime passengers alike, welcome to the Train; I’m your conductor this evening. If you went to any cinema lover and questioned why they have such an adoration for film, many would probably pinpoint specific directors, visionaries, and scenes that left that person enchantingly spellbound. The greats such as Scorsese, Spielberg, Allen, Tarantino, Kurosawa, and Kubrick are commonly upon these lists, but I feel that another creator deserves his name in this category as well: the great Ray Harryhausen.
Who was this fellow, and what kind of legacy did he leave behind? Ray was a stop-motion animator, meaning that he designed clay figures and animated their movements. In this case, they were whimsical beasts unlike anything you’ve ever seen. Living skeletons in Jason and the Argonauts, a cyclops and two-headed vulture (insert a shameless reference to my novel here) in The 7th Voyage of Sinbad, a colossal crustacean in Mysterious Island, and rampaging dinosaurs in The Valley of Gwangi. Oh, and Harryhausen never called his projects “monsters”, but instead the more respectful “creatures”. Hence why this post’s subtitle is “Creatures of Clay”.
Now that I have informed you on Harryhausen’s background in practical effects, let’s get this how on the road and take a closer look at one of his most acclaimed works, The 7th Voyage of Sinbad. The swashbuckling adventure was released in 1958; isn’t that a blast from the past! Even a duo of sequels, The Golden Voyage of Sinbad and Sinbad and the Eye of the Tiger — to my dismay, not a nod to the Survivor song — came from the springboard though neither fared as successfully.
Though Harryhausen’s stunning creatures would have been enticing enough, 7th Voyage was implemented with yet another gimmick to magnetize audiences to their local theater. The technique was called Dynamation, the so-called “new miracle of the screen”. Call it what you will, either way it still encapsulated Harryhausen’s trademark style. A decent promotional short subject, shown above, declared that using new technological advances and color they opened “vast new vistas in motion picture entertainment”. Dynamation was used all the way until 1981 with Clash of the Titans, then afterwards Ray retired from the profession. In a original review by Time magazine for Clash of the Titans, they quipped that “The real titan is Ray Harryhausen”.
On May 7, 2013, it was announced publicly that Ray has passed away at the age of 92. Many statements from filmmakers who were inspired by his work were made; Edgar Wright (the Three Flavors Cornetto trilogy, Baby Driver) said that “He was the man who made me believe in monsters”, Peter Lord (Aardman Animations) wrote that Harryhausen was “a one-man industry and a one-man genre”, and even George Lucas admitted that “Without Harryhausen, there would have likely been no Star Wars“. Wow. Allow that to sink in for a second.
We’ll return to review 7th Voyage after these messages…
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We now return!
The 7th Voyage of Sinbad Review
The daring seafarer Sinbad is soon to be newlywed to Princess Parisa and bind together two kingdoms. However, the princess is shrunken to miniature stature by a dastardly sorcerer in search for a lost genie lamp. This encourages Sinbad to return to the island of Colassa to retrieve a shell, which is needed to return the princess to her regular size. The sorcerer only comes along so he can take the lamp back for himself, battling against the intrepid sailor when he finds it in his possession. Can Sinbad defeat the sorcerer and his monsters, while in the process saving his bride?
Perhaps where this movie’s personality most shines through is in its stop-motion magic. Computer generated graphics, or CGI, is practically omnipresent in Hollywood films today, but it always feels a bit lifeless. Simply put, not a single time has CGI in a live-action blockbuster ever felt like it had genuine heart and soul poured into the work. I applaud you if you do love working on CGI in films, if any folks like that are reading this post in the first place. Despite how rudimentary and uncouth it can be by modern standards, Harryhausen’s work literally was made by hand.
Of course, not every film is without its flaws. For 7th Voyage, at times the story can become bogged down as it drags its feet, particularly with overlong scenes without any creatures. The childlike fantasy of the whole thing, comparable to that of a bedtime story of sorts, connotes that the acting and overall storyline is very tedious. An antagonistic magician, the one-dimensional princess, a hazardous journey. I’m sure we’ve all seen this before in other media, perhaps slightly better. Thankfully, the creatures on display elevate this Sinbad film into more recognizable esteem.
Although The 7th Voyage of Sinbad can tread rough waters in some moments, it might be Ray’s most important movie. This was the very first feature he worked on that was filmed in color, and it influenced a bunch of young kids at the time who would grow into phenomenal filmmakers. With sword and sandal swordfights and a bombastic score by Bernard Herrmann, this iconic motion picture won’t impress today’s moviegoers, but you cannot deny the footprint left by the magnificent Ray Harryhausen. I recommend viewing it for yourself, if only to see the magnificent effects of the time!
Konnichiwa! I’m your conductor, and tonight we’ll be looking back on the first directorial work by the legendary Japanese visionary Hayao Miyazaki: The Castle of Cagliostro from 1979. The film was among the tens of hundreds of adaptations of the Monkey Punch manga starring the eponymous Lupin, although it was still early on in the character’s long-lasting history. Furthermore, the immense shadow of Miyazaki’s beloved later movies (such as the acclaimed Spirited Away, the heartwarming My Neighbor Totoro, and the epic Princess Mononoke) was a rather mammoth expectation to live up to. Now that I’ve actually watched Castle of Cagliostro for myself (twice no less!), let’s get this show on the road and determine whether or not it lives up.
A cache of apparent counterfeit casino money draws the charming gentleman thief Arsene Lupin III to the province of Cagliostro. He soon unravels a scheme by the Count, the mastermind behind the counterfeit manufacturing, who arranges a forced marriage to the princess Clarisse. Along with his comrades — the chain-smoking sharpshooter Jigen, impassive swordsman Goemon, maverick Fujiko, and on-and-off nemesis Inspector Zenigata — Lupin takes it upon himself to help rescue Clarisse from the Count’s unscrupulous clutches.
It’s been openly stated that Steven Spielberg was influenced by Castle of Cagliostro during the production of his own action-adventure film, Raiders of the Lost Ark. Ring a bell? And this film’s effect on Indiana Jones is clear in the zippy action sequences, including a fast-paced car chase in the first 15 minutes or so, and witty banter exchanged by Lupin and his allies. This as well, with some competition, is the most recognized and savored slice of Lupin media, despite the criticism targeted at the sugar-coated characterization. So, what’s up with that?
The original manga iteration of Lupin was far from the well-meaning and clumsy goofball many people know. So, a challenge was entailed to Miyazaki to create an amiable hero out of a formerly salacious, remorseless crook that drove a Mercedes-Benz thanks to it being “Hitler’s favorite”. No simple feat, I may remind you. The final product is solid considering the predicament though, in where he goes out of his way to aid someone in worse circumstances then himself and rides a tarnished yellow Fiat 500 instead (thank goodness for that). Some fans who have been around from the very start aren’t typically applauding Lupin’s brave, bumbling deeds; they would rather see him as he was intended by the creator… as a ruthless criminal! Even Monkey Punch says he thinks the film is “excellent” on its own merit, though he cannot deny that the character changed drastically.
Since I saw this film twice on back-to-back days, there were a handful of qualities that stood out more on second viewing. The backgrounds and color palette are all rather magnificent on their own, but some of the movements and expressions are a bit janky overall. The buildup leading to the finale, which is a very good one mind you, is somewhat slow as Lupin is bedridden from an injury and an ensemble is migrating towards the castle for the wedding. However, there was something that notably delighted me second time around: the action sequences!
The aforementioned mountainside car chase to rescue Clarisse from the Count’s goons, a mix-up between the castle guards and Interpol agents, a rooftop scene, and the battle in the clock tower are all standouts in this consistently fun escapade. It will manage to entertain you as long as you are unwavering in the largely kinetic slapstick.
The Castle of Cagliostro is a rollicking time, Lupin fan or not. Obviously Miyazaki would flourish later in his career, but the genial and light-hearted caper is a perfect appetizer. I generally find it intriguing to explore where a filmmaker began before they become a staple of cinema treasures, so this proved a memorable experience. Hmm? You haven’t seen it yet? Well, go watch it on Netflix afterwards! You will thank me… maybe, I don’t know.
RATING: 7.5/10 “Highly Recommended”
Also, why did the butler look like Beetlejuice with broccoli for hair? So many questions…
Transmission disconnected…
NEXT THURSDAY | A Tribute to the Great Ray Harryhausen
This is the way… eh, a bit overstated but it works. Hello, and welcome once again to the twelfth official entry of Out of Order! I will be your conductor this evening, but perhaps you may not have known that I’m rather the fan of Star Wars. True, its quality in the main film saga is nearing their expiration date though other media seems to be going strong. Case in point, the wildly popular program The Mandalorian, which echos spaghetti western and pulpy adventure serials in an exhilarating galactic fashion. A third season is, at the moment, being curated for the Disney+ streaming service, so now is a better time then any to rank all the episodes of the freshmen and sophomore years from the bottom to the top. If you haven’t seen this series yet, major plot details are going to be discussed so I would recommend come back to this post once you’ve seen both seasons. Let’s get this how on the road!
16. “The Heiress (Season 2, Episode 3)”
This just goes to show how even the low-hanging fruits of the tree are still ripe, though they don’t quite hit their bullseye. In this rather short episode, we are reintroduced to a Clone Wars jewel, Bo-Katan, played by her original voice actor Katee Sackhoff. They also guarantee the comeback of Ashoka Tano by the end! My primary reason for ranking this entry as the weakest is relatively simple: it feels like yet another addition to the half baked formula of doing favors that is present in far too much of Season 2’s middle. Nothing is awful, but I was thoroughly dissatisfied come the credits.
15. “The Gunslinger (Season 1, Episode 5)”
Surprisingly enough, not a single folk I’ve talked with actually enjoyed this episode all the way through. At first glance it doesn’t sound like a low tier episode, but a large chunk of the runtime is Mando and this smug rookie dude straight from a car dealership keeping an eye on the mercenary Fennec Shand. Peli Motto, a nervous Tatooine mechanic, is another new recurring player, although she left a very small effect on the overarching plot of both seasons and as a character essentially. The only small sliver saving it from plunging into last place was the cliffhanger, of which we would discover with season 2 was the first ever allusion to Boba Fett’s return from the grave.
14. “The Passenger (Season 2, Episode 2)”
Have you ever wanted to see a crossover between Star Wars and Alien? If that’s the case, you’ll end up having a fun watch with “The Passenger”. Otherwise, I’m utterly divided. Where on one hand I commend the refreshing change of pace and horror-esque strokes, this in a sense has a damaging case of being the sore thumb sticking out from the rest of the second bunch of episodes. It just feels a bit off-kilter compared to the additional offerings. You either go really jarring, Cowboy Bebop “Toys in the Attic” on us, or brew a lukewarm one-off pit stop like this. Oh, yeah, and the Child might be murderous now? Film at 11.
13. “The Prisoner (Season 1, Episode 6)”
The Mandalorian is recruited by a former associate to join a medley of shifty fellows in rescuing a captive of the New Republic and, for what it’s worth, I had a good time with it. The action proves to be tense and it manages to pull a couple of storytelling tricks up its sleeve in the end, too. Keep a lookout for one of the Child’s most memorable gags where he mistakenly is convinced that he has used the force to fend off a foe.
12. “The Child (Season 1, Episode 2)”
“The Child” is not far from just being the second part of the pilot, but it’s quite remarkable and is remarkably effective regarding the pace. Following the reveal of Baby Yoda at the end of the first episode, this episode subverts everyone’s expectations of where the plot was headed, but nothing feels sloppy about it. It has the works; Nick Nolte in a lovable performance as Kuiil, antagonistic Jawas, and a battle with a space rhino in a mud pit fighting for an egg. What more could you want?
11. “The Siege (Season 2, Episode 4)”
I just love action-filled episodes, don’t you? The appearance of two fan favorite characters assist Mando to infiltrate an Imperial facility, where they discover something sinister is in the making. Not much too elaborate on besides it retaining that classic mixture of a lightning-in-a-bottle endeavor with just the right pinch of humor and weave into the overarching setup. Well, it appears that the Child also committed larceny by stealing a kid’s macaroon in this episode. Oy vey.
10. “The Tragedy (Season 2, Episode 6)”
Don’t allow that tight runtime fool you, because this episode easily takes the trophy of knitting all the buildup into one entertaining burst. Thanks to direction by cinematic dumpster fire Robert Rodriguez (and I mean that adjective as tenderly as possible), the limited setting amplifies every direction that has lead up to here even more rousing. Boba Fett bargaining for his iconic armor, the Razor Crest is obliterated, the Child is abducted by Gideon, and a wonderfully filmed melee against stormtroopers are handled well by the poised direction of Rodriguez. He might have stirred up the CGI-laden Spy Kids and Machete films, but his focused vision here is nothing to sneeze at.
9. “The Believer (Season 2, Episode 7)”
Sure, it absolutely sidelines the velocity building up to the finale, but “The Believer” dishes up thought-provoking ideas around the character of Mayfeld. This effort recognizes from brilliant execution by Bill Burr that perhaps the galaxy isn’t just the struggles of the morally good and the bad. Toss in Pedro Pascal’s face and callbacks to The Wages of Fear and Friedkin’s Sorcerer for good measure, this is a resonant inclusion that barely surmounted the bottom half.
8. “The Reckoning (Season 1, Episode 7)”
Maybe my biggest problem here is that it does feel more like setting up all the dominoes for the finale instead of standing as its own individual thing. So, basically the opposite of “The Believer”! Giancarlo Esposito arriving as the intimidating Moff Gideon and the heart-wrenching end of the line for Kuiil are definite to stress any viewer for what’s to come. More layout than a genuine premise, though it’s nonetheless exciting to watch Mando formulate a team of recurring players like Cara Dune and Greef Karga to rescue the Child.
7. “The Jedi (Season 2, Episode 5)”
Excluding the true name of the Child being disclosed as Grogu, this salute to samurai epics is as well-shot and enticing as even the best of Akira Kurosawa works. Rosario Dawson nails it as the live-action incarnation of the beloved Ashoka Tano, stealing the show every second she was in frame. Dave Filoni really knocked this one out of the park. A solid 8/10, and yet there are still six more even better episodes to go! Seriously though… Grogu was the best they had?
6. “The Sin (Season 1, Episode 3)”
If anyone is even mildly hesitant on how the rough-and-rigid “The Sin” landed above “The Jedi”, I get it. But this is where I feel the show actually started to pick up some steam and, in the general sense, the battle sequences are sharp and the Child is integrated as a main member of the cast. I have little to say about this stellar beginning that promises an inventive direction for this newfound duo.
We’ll return with the Top Five after these messages…
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We’re looking at you, General Grievous.
5. “The Rescue (Season 2, Episode 8)”
Arguably the best reviewed episode by audiences, the flagpole finale of the second season is as explosive as you would expect. I’m usually against the intrusion of characters from the main Star Wars trilogy hammering on the door to other projects devoid of them (I’m looking at you, Skywalkers), and this sadly doesn’t avoid this trap. Hence why I ranked it fifth, as the rest remains marvelous indeed. If Luke didn’t waltz in and take Grogu at the climax, this without a doubt could’ve been in my top three.
4. “The Mandalorian (Season 1, Episode 1)”
Ah, that’s a nice one; the episode that started the whole series. Let’s pause for a moment of respect, shall we… anyways, I really enjoyed this entry. “The Mandalorian” instantly delves us straight into the criminal underbelly of the Star Wars universe. I vividly recall the anticipation for this fresh show starring a Mandalore bounty hunter character in his debut, watching the premiere with a group of friends, and being blown away by the revelation of “Baby Yoda” (so to speak). Call it slow or tepid, be that as it may acknowledging it kicked off what would evolve into a great production.
3. “The Marshal (Season 2, Episode 1)”
Mando shows up at a rundown Tatooine town to help reunite the Child with others of his species. In the process, he must assist sheriff Cobb Vanth in mending ties between the townspeople and the Tusken Raiders when a desert dragon threatens them all. Timothy Olyphant as Vanth is a really amusing guest star full of potential, and it disappoints me that he hasn’t appeared as a periodic player. If Peli Motto has credits in three episodes, why not invite Vanth as well. The assault on the giant creature is a slow and steady affair that certainly pays off, the Child is at no shortage here, and it’ll leave you with stupefied with the shot of a scarred, aged Boba Fett. And you gotta love a relaxed Tusken Raider bonfire session, who doesn’t.
2. “Sanctuary (Season 1, Episode 4)”
The straightforward tale of the Mandalorian and Cara Dune training a forest village to take a stand against the sparse Imperials is tonight’s runner-up. The allusions to Seven Samurai and High Plains Drifter are strong with this one (you see what I did there!), but that isn’t the entire appeal of “Sanctuary”. An emotional conclusion, the introduction of Dune perfected by Gina Carano’s acting, a surplus of adorable instances with the Child… it’s the complete package! A pitch perfect episode in every manner. Well, thanks for reading this far; and now, my number one —
1. “Redemption (Season 1, Episode 8)”
While others praise the second season finale as the best episode thus far, my eyes turn to this finale instead. “Redemption”, in many ways, holds up with a bunch of what drew me into the show – likable and dense characters, a great sense of humor, riveting action, and even on top of all that, an enduring bond between Mando and Grogu. Taika Waititi absolutely exceeds as a double role, directing and playing IG-11, the latter of whom I’m saddened won’t be seen in the series down the line. On the whole, it was satisfying conclusion to a season-long story arc, and even at that a creative tease for the future of their adventures. This will always remain my favorite episode of the series for me.
So, flaws and all, I do say wholeheartedly that The Mandalorian is a spectacular show. It’s a few blocks down from perfection, but as I said, its without a doubt the best and more consistent Star Wars media to come out of modern memory. I can’t wait to watch where further seasons go…
RATING: 8/10
NEXT WEEK | Lupin the III in The Castle of Cagliostro!
Ciao! Thank you again for tuning in aboard the Train; to newcomers, calling me Gavin will work just fine. Today’s review is for the award-winning sports drama Ford v. Ferrari, released not terribly long ago in 2019 and directed by James Mangold of Walk the Line and Logan. This is dipping my toes in more recent waters, but there’s always a start for everything, right? Without further ado, let’s get this show on the road! Or racetrack, whatever works.
Set during the colorful 60s backdrop, Carroll Shelby is met with the opportunity by the Ford Motors Co. to compete against the successful Italian sports car producer Enzo Ferrari in the 24 Hours of Le Mans. With only a few months on the line, the Ford engineers design the GT40 Mk 1 for the race, earning the aid of irritable British mechanic Ken Miles in the process. Can Shelby and Miles beat the Ferrari’s winning streak?
The most aggravating about Ford v. Ferrari is not the movie’s fault in the slightest, though a few duds will be inquired momentarily. The title of the feature is nowhere near wretched, but it could have come out stronger. It’s emotional core and even the genuine screenplay itself aren’t focused on the clash between these two car manufacturers; rather, it stands firmly with morphing a well-rounded main pair of comrades. Ford is more against Ford then they are Ferrari here. Think about it: Shelby is frequently bickering with his money-hungry bosses over the development for nearly every circumstance… so was that title truly the best fit within context?
But why am I making a big fuss over something so indifferent as, well, a title? Digging down into the nitty-gritty, the motion picture can be a bit slow at times. No doubt that the two-and-a-half hour length is a factor there. I do wholeheartedly respect more character-orientated movies, and don’t get me wrong, the balance between thrilling racing choreography that audiences crave and well-written drama is done fairly. I can’t add anything insightful to praise Ford v. Ferrari that hasn’t already been described, except that it’s one of my favorite sports films at the moment alongside Rocky Balboa. ‘Cause no matter how much I talk about obscure 70s bargain bin treasures, this stuff is admittedly better work; what’s amusing to me in retrospect, I reference and bring up my adoration for b-movie commodities, but deep down I note how Ford v. Ferrari has a far fresher quality than Viva Knievel. All apologies to Evel.
I am going to turn the attention now to the acting (hopefully none of you mind!). In this, the film is excellent. Matt Damon as Shelby has a handful of great interactions against his good-for-nothing corporate bosses, such as a scene where they lock the antagonistic vice president in his office and takes Henry Ford II on a drift outside. Meanwhile, the volatile Miles is depicted by Christian Bale, who brings a nice charisma into his role as a dedicated racer.
Though the overstretched runtime becomes exasperating, this energetic race does offer enough stellar sequences at Le Mans to make it worth the trip. You don’t even need to be a middle-aged suburban father to enjoy this one! Mangold’s zinging zest and vintage Hollywood vibe feels remarkable, especially in this day and age. It’s basically fundamental cinema. Definitely recommended to all suburban dads out there (you know who you are)!
RATING: 6/10 “Best Served with a Cold Beer”
NEXT WEEK | Complete Mandalorian Season 1 & 2 Ranking
Hello, and welcome back aboard; I’m your conductor and today we will be wrapping up our Very Merry Espionage Christmas. And yes, I get it, the holidays have been long gone for a month or two already. Though for me, as long as it’s still winter, the show must go on! Ever heard of the phrase, “If you remember the 60s, you weren’t there”? The decade was filled to the brim of psychedelic bizarro, with groundbreaking films and television that demonstrated how sex, drugs, and rock ‘n’ roll really do sell to the masses. A very popular craze that swept the nation along with counterculture and Beatlemania was James Bond films, so there was no doubt that many hitched on the bandwagon themselves. Consider this a 60s Spy ‘Poster Potpourri’, if you may. Let’s get started!
Here Comes U.N.C.L.E!
Ah yes, The Man from U.N.C.L.E. Airing for a substantial 4 years on cable television, it evolved into such a cultural phenomenon that it soon had king-sized episodes spanning one consecutive story arc repackaged as a b-feature for cinemas. These were also smashing hits, proving that the missions of Napoleon Solo and Illya Kuryakin were the so-called U.N.C.L.E’s to beat.
Dimension 5 (1966)
Here’s a real stinker… not even Sakata could save this one! A huge chunk of the difference from the copy-and-paste espionage cutouts was that this one they time-traveled. You interested? Not after you’ve actually seen the loony plot and bored set design and acting, you won’t.
Danger: Diabolik & Barbarella (1968)
Okay, Barbarella might not be a costumed spy exactly, but Jane Fonda and its stylistic relation to the additional movie in this blurb are enough to draw me in. Even despite its infamy later on, the feature was not a huge critical or commercial success. Furthermore, following the juggernaut that was the original Star Wars in 1977, most sci-fi movies before was credited as ludicrous or cheesy. But in our modern times, people tend to be rather odd, especially in their tastes. Thus, thankfully Barbarella was raised to cult status. Mario Bava’s directorial work on Danger: Diabolik is worthy of noting as well for being another thick slice of stylized, Swinging Sixties spy fiction. Barbarella and Danger: Diabolik are commonly paired because of their comic book foundations and a lead performance by John Phillip Law, hence explaining why I put them in the same section. Kinetic and off the wall, surely these exploitation gems will never be forgotten.
Seeing Double 007!
Fun fact: In his autobiography Back to the Batcave, Adam West described most of pop culture in the 60s as “the Three B’s; Bond, Batman, and the Beatles”. And it’s true, saying James Bond was “at large” is something of an understatement. Bargain bin Bond’s popped up everywhere, occasionally imported from Europe. This established the phrase “Eurospy”, which transitions to this film here. Yep, definitely your generic Eurospy!
Ice Station Zebra: Espionage Below Zero!
Hear me out — the IMDb page credits this as ‘espionage’ so I do have an excuse on this one, unlike Barbarella. The film premiered at the iconic Cinerama Dome in ’68, although because of this Stanley Kubrick’s masterwork 2001: A Space Odyssey had to be removed prematurely from its still fruitful run at the cinema. That is a shame, since 2001 is a far better film than Ice Station Zebra generally; the former is usually regarded as one of the best of all time, and this Cold War lackluster thriller is more on par with a stretched thin Saturday morning cartoon. Although Rock Hudson, who leads as Commander James Farraday in the feature, has labled it as his personal favorite work. So… at least he likes it?
Fiendish! Fantastic! Frightening!
Who else but Fu Manchu, my old nemesis. If the handful of you are aware, I have talked about this diabolical Mongol of Misery beforehand on my forgotten film franchises post. The dude’s slim mustache strand is legendary. But today in our conceptually more “civilized” society, Fu Manchu (the Chinese villain) versus Nayland Smith (the White British Hero) would not fly among our culturally insensible nation. But back in the day if you just came searching for laughable evil genius storylines, you were in good hands! And considering the meager budgets associated with them, they unconventionally kept the design primarily in the 20s rather than updating the period, much like what the German krimi movies at the time did also. Bravo!
Enjoy the Fine Arts of Venice…
“Murder! Spies! Women!”, exclaimed the tagline of our final poster featured this evening. With Robert Vaughn as a former CIA agent, The Venetian Affair joined the ranks as a recognizable title in the Eurospy index. A justifiable falsehood is that this motion picture was another The Man from U.N.C.L.E adventure. How come? Well, every episode of the series ended with “affair” (however, none of the films did) and Vaughn was commonly corresponded with his role as Napoleon Solo. Was it a ploy, perhaps?
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Greetings, and welcome back to the Train. If this is your first time visiting, I am your conductor and movie connoisseur Gavin Nowak writing here this evening. On tonight’s insightful episode of Out of Order, let’s take a time machine back to the early 80s, before the popularity of theater cable networks like HBO and Showtime. Enter Jerry Harvey, a classic exemplar of a cinephile (or in other words, having a passionate love of film). He helped pioneer the likes of many failed motion pictures by blossoming in them new life through his Z Channel. So, how did the “film festival in your home every night” fall from grace? Let’s get this show on the road and look at the legacy of one lunatic legend.
Although the influence of Harvey’s ingenious creative control would grow, ‘the Z’ started modestly back in 1974 as a straightforward pay service around the Southern California locale. It held a middle ground between airing conventional blockbusters that were far from their heyday in cinema chains and lesser-known oddities on the lineup. Eventually, Harvey was recruited to assist in operating the schedule of Z Channel in 1980. At the time a programmer for a prior community theater and having a single writing credit for the 1978 spaghetti western China 9, Liberty 37, Harvey likely independently elevated the average movie tube into a movie lover’s paradise. Even despite how it never inflated to more of western America, the impact of Harvey’s novelty was practically worldwide.
His encyclopedic assortment of cult movies from the crypt and director’s extended cuts became staples of the hit Z Channel, even for a handful of years having more viewers then the available yet recycled TV feature airings in Los Angeles. While Z was under Harvey’s out-of-the-ordinary approach it maintained an eclectic personality that later down the road inspired filmmakers Quentin Tarantino (Pulp Fiction, Kill Bill) and Jim Jarmusch (Stranger than Paradise, Mystery Train), Turner Classic Movies, and some individual video epithets such as Grindhouse Releasing.
Pretty neat promo for the film Death Race 2000 here
Director of the Oscar-winning 1978 The Deer Hunter, Michael Cimino released two years later the 3 and a half hour long epic Heaven’s Gate; due to the skeptical distribution studio removing a little over 60 minutes of the runtime, the critical response turned up zealously negative. Perhaps all hope had been forlorn, but then an unexpected critical reappraisal took place, where audiences could at long last envision Cimino’s true vision. That was after Harvey meshed back the unused hour-length footage into a restored uncut version of Heaven’s Gate and spotlighted it on Z. He literally rose the feature back from it’s grave!
Of course, his renaissance of upturned forgotten classics would carry on through out the vivid backdrop of the 1980s. A few titles that were broadcast by Harvey salvaged from the decade before included Videodrome, Whose Life is it Anyway?, Harry and Tonto, Jesus Christ Superstar, Death Race 2000, and extended cuts of other box office flops like the mafia biography Once Upon a Time in America and Robert Altman’s McCabe and Mrs. Miller. The Z was on a stellar winning streak for years, going out of the way to recover director’s cuts, presenting films when applicable in their intended aspect ratio dimensions, and with their subscriber tally increasing daily. What defiance could perchance bring an end to this unstoppable powerhouse? As we’ll quickly learn, both inner and outside causes would evidently bring Z to it’s premature demise…
Don’t go away, Out of Order will return after these messages.
We’ll be right back!
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So, Jerry Harvey thought he could have it all. But, as history would depict, alas, Z and Harvey would share the same unfortunate fate. Notwithstanding that Harvey was generally viewed as a mellow but academic personality, his own personal demons revolving around his two sisters’ suicides would haunt him. After tackling with their deaths for many hard nights, Harvey too ended his life on April 9, 1988. Sparing the details, it was truly a unprecedented shock to his colleagues, and the Z Channel would never genuinely be the same again. Meanwhile, a year later following Harvey’s death, the once esteemed Z Channel was steadily being chewed out by most other opposing cable TV in the L.A county. To stay alive in the kerfuffle, blocks of sports programs would be wedged in between the varied films, although even in this conclusion the sports would also play a hand in the networks’s expiration. The Z had, on one sorrowful day, faded to utter darkness on television screens after the John Ford film My Darling Clementine, the channel’s final program. It was then hastily replaced by SportsChannel Los Angeles. The outcome of Harvey’s suicide would usher in the equal death of the Z Channel spirit. Because, as many of his friends like Cimino and FX Feeney hypothesize, when his life was ended, so was the Z’s.
Though perhaps, just perhaps, that spark wasn’t burned out entirely from the hearts of movie wizards. In 2004, a documentary directed by the daughter of scholarly director John Cassavetes (Shadows, A Woman Under the Influence) called Z Channel: A Magnificent Obsession, would be released to select theaters. The film, featuring plenty of investing interviews and snippets of the motion pictures the Z would broadcast, has enlightened student movie buffs with an installation of how Harvey formed a golden era. Experiencing the love of the channel and the life of the mentally scourged Jerry Harvey has helped me appreciate the simple coterie of aspiring filmmakers seeing eye to eye.
Could we too resurrect that touching feeling of community within the new generation of aspiring writers and directors? Instead of rather treating our movie-going trips as diversions from modern living? Well, not for some time, no. That may be rather laughable to tie loose ends so quickly. But hey, it’s a start.
Later…
NEXT WEEK | A Very Merry Espionage Christmas Concludes!
Hello and happy Valentines! I am your conductor here aboard the railroad, and tonight we’re going to be looking at one real doozy of a love story. Not in that traditional, love at first sight dynamic between two characters, rather, the total admiration of a certain passion. So not love in the romantic term, but in the textbook definition. The film is School of Rock, directed by Richard Linklater (Dazed and Confused, Boyhood) and stars the hilarious Jack Black. So, without wasting any more breath, let’s get this show on the road and determine this “true love”.
Dewey Finn, a guitarist that is kicked out of a rock band, begins to swim in wallow and debt. However, he inconspicuously impersonates his mild-mannered roommate as a substitute teacher at a posh private school. Finn’s energetic nature and larks leave a positive impact on the children, encouraging them to form a scattershot rock band. Can the upcoming “Battle of the Bands” be won, or will the principal dissolve Finn’s facade?
So essentially what I was implying before was Black’s character Dewey Finn’s love of rock music. And you can read through the performance how much Black is dedicated the role and was probably having the time of his life. For many, they will recognize him as the second half of “mock rock” band Tenacious D, so in many ways I’m sure the real actor also loved heavy metal as much as his persona featured in School of Rock. Black also harnesses some form of charisma naturally, as if he were some mythical aura creature from the wild. Or in other words, born an entertainer. Such a great job!
Now as a Survivor fan – guilty as charged – I did notice the name of one Mike White, a fellow who has created a couple of movies and was a castaway in season 37 of the eponymous reality show. He, in addition, portrays Finn’s scapegoat flatmate Ned Schneebly; such a fitting name for a character with his personality. But his writing for the film is really solid, displaying marvelously each main players’ faults and executing something very refreshing… by not talking down to the audience! Hollywood hot shots, please just stop acting like we’re chowderheads (food reference ahoy, Vic). We don’t need to be spoon-fed (another!).
Unironically for a film with Richard Linklater at the wheel, School of Rock is very funny; in a way where the humor is timeless. Underneath all the comedy euphoria and Black’s refined acting chops, the story is equally anchored by strong schmaltz. Upon a deeper dive, White’s screenplay feels almost like a closely knitted fabric of farce from everyday life. It doesn’t ignore the weave of little whimsies, it thrives with them. And, as the great Roger Ebert inquired, “… Dewey Finn doesn’t star as a disreputable character and then turns gooey. Jack Black remains true to his irascible character all the way through…”.
Now take this into consideration: I’ve seen a solid handful of band films, and yet not too many of them successfully encourage me to join in a music group. I mean, I have minimal interest in the band lifestyle, maybe excusing the comradeship and the fact that actually listening to music is a moderately more appealing hobby. But then again, I am not even slightly magnetized to being a pirate, but Hook and Castle in the Sky make it look pretty sick, right? Now, I guess we’ll await the eventual raging comments from swashbucklers or something insulting their way of life. Trust me, you would not believe the odd spam messages I receive.
Anyways, back to the film now. While the scope and morals of Tinsel Town are constantly shifting to the current trope in cinema, our film “critics” have transformed into sardonic and picky viewers. They’re always desiring wholly original, complex, arthouse motion pictures and nothing less, which is sort of disheartening. Although the thing is, many of them do really enjoy School of Rock. I’m starting to miss the bygone era where on frequent occasion these critics can admit to having a good time watching something as one-note but entertaining as Jack Black teaching stuck up kids how to rock and roll. Those were the good days.
RATING: 7.5/10
Thanks for tuning in!
NEXT WEEK | Z Channel and the Legacy of the “Daily TV Film Festival”
Yabba Dabba Do! Welcome back to the Lighttrain, I am your host and conductor today. Despite what the stigma of James Bond movies will tell you, not every imitator was attempting to create their own quick-buck franchise. In fact, some were just spoofing the Bond genre, rather then boarding the band wagon. Case in point, The Man Called Flintstone from 1966. As that title would lead you to believe, yes, this was a motion picture based off of the popular Hanna-Barbara animated series The Flintstones. What in the name of Betty Rubble was this really, though? Buckle your seat belts, we’re about to find out. Let’s get this show on the road!
After a spy named Rock Slab is hospitalized, the Bedrock secret service recruits an average joe who bears a striking resemblance to the operative. Who is this fellow? Why, it’s Fred Flintstone, like you’ve never seen him before! Will he be able to dodge his family and friend’s suspicions and defeat the diabolical Green Goose? “Legionnaire” is his middle name after all. Fred Legionnaire Flintstone… has a nice ring, wouldn’t you say?
The show was meant to be a so-called swan song for the television show since shortly before the film’s release The Flintstones was cancelled for good. But… really? You want to cap off your highly influential cartoon with a James Bond parody? Well, you do you, Mr. Hanna and Barbara. From what I have gathered, the film gathered a mildly amused response, but not much else. There’s a reason you likely haven’t even heard of this. The clips are alright in my books, as is the series it’s concluding.
A Cartoon Network advert for the film
What’s even stranger is that The Man Called Flintstone was additionally a musical on top of the already thick secret agent homage. I have not seen the movie for myself since I don’t have the kind of spare cash to have Amazon.com send me a Flintstones box set I’ll probably never watch again, so I can’t really confirm or judge the quality of these musical interludes. But hey, that’s what the poster claims! In the opening credits as can be seen online, the film’s distributor Columbia Pictures, known for the Statue of Liberty as their studio’s logo, actually stars Wilma Flintstone as the torch lady. Somewhat a delightful tidbit, I suppose. Shame is, that intro was permanently nullified from all of the DVD prints. I’m pretty sure it’s accessible on Youtube, albeit in slipshod condition.
An added bonus for familiar fans, the film’s one-time antagonist the Green Goose has no relation with the alien Great Gazoo. The latter character does not appear, nor even worthy of a mention, in The Man Called Flintstone, having only recurred halfway through the final season of the show as to “jump the shark”. Basically the term applied when a once celebrated, later dulled TV program attempts to infuse a gimmick to bait back in audiences; funny story, the phrase was coined in 1977 after the sitcom Happy Days, struggling in the ratings, promoted how the character Fonzie was going to jump over a shark while on water-skis. You learn something new every day.
Don’t go away, we’ll be right back!
How did I find this random ad from Japan is the real question…
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Thanks for tuning in! And now, on with the show.
So…what happened? Afterwards The Flintstones sort of went underground, appearing in Cartoon Network airings until 2004 and the occasional Fruity Pebbles commercial. I suppose even after retiring from Cartoon Network’s schedule it found a contemporary home in the former’s sister channel, Boomerang. Though, Boomerang had the legacy of that one network the kid with the flu watched at 2:00 in the morning since they couldn’t watch Cartoon Network because Aqua Teen Hunger Force was on. Sorta sad, but comforting enough. It may have played on a loop for a whole decade, although it still managed to introduce me to unique stuff before my time like Top Cat, Wacky Races, and those odd music videos with vintage Hanna-Barbara characters. I can totally include that Jabberjaw one on my mixtape and be fine with it.
“🎶What does Scooby do that we neglect?🎶” Song by Pain
The legacy, if that’s what one may call it, is a bit strange. Strange in the sense that it is nonexistent. Granted, it’s a very bewildering project midway through the psychadelia of the 1960s, which also explains the Great Gazoo! That little floating bulbous breath mint must’ve been the brainchild of that era, am I wrong? Even through and through, The Flinstones has definitely delved into far more peculiar territory. A Seth MacFarlane remake that never saw the light of day, The Flintstones meet WWE (whatever that is), and Viva Rock Vegas was just something else all together.
For now, it’s just another of those obscure conversation topics. Next time you message your friends you could tell them about how Fred Flintstone was a secret agent in a full-length movie before. Maybe that would crack a grin, I dunno. What I do know is that I’m likely going to forget that this ever existed, then possibly bury it back up again while procrastinating. Hey, it happens. For the second motion picture by Hanna-Barbara, this ain’t all that bad. Mainly plain vanilla, but I’m in the mood for that subtle taste every now and then. I rarely watch many animated James Bond lampoons. Like… three, that’s including this one. And even if I watched a macroscale of them instead, I would more or less review it the same way. Later.
~ Transmission Disconnected ~
THURSDAY, FEBRUARY 11 | Dewey Finn + Rock ‘n Roll… School of Rock Valentine’s Review!
Good evening ladies and gentlemen! It’s that time of the month again… the time for announcements. This February is filled up with spy-fiction goodness, more lost media munchies, and a special Valentine’s day review baked up just for you guys. Without more delay, here’s some news for your palette.
As we kick off the month strong, part 3 of our very merry espionage Christmas will be a retrospective look on The Man Called Flintstone, a crazy oddball animated film starring Fred Flintstone of the titular Hanna Barbara series as a secret agent! Kooky stuff indeed. Plus a tangent about Boomerang and the forgotten Cartoon Network music videos, and a rare Japanese Flintstone bump. All that coming this Thursday. Then the following week I’m curating a mystery Valentine’s day romantic affair. It’s going to be a review for the rock and roll lovers out there. Later this month as well, expect Z Channel: A Magnificent Obsession on our show Out of Order and the fourth and final espionage Christmas look-back.
Also in the scoop, thank you guys so much for 100 passengers to the Train! This truly means everything to me, and I’m grateful of your persistent returns and kind words. It’s so amazing to bond with others about vintage oddities and the like. Once again, my condolences. I would additionally feel like giving shout outs to smaller blogs similar to mine that I feel deserve equal, or even more, subscribers to myself. Go check out them here:
For your information, I’m going to discontinue listing every single one of my subscribers at the end of all my weekly posts. Since that at this point I have reached 100, and who knows if it will grow even further in the next year, it simply absorbs far too much time. It may even eat up a fourth of the entire post. Instead, so I can still pay tribute to you folks, I’m going to infuse the list at the end of these updates post.
Well, thanks for stopping by and reading today, and catch you on Thursday. Tally ho!
This one’s going out to all the fallen media we shall not forget. My name is Gavin, or you may better know me as your conductor. Welcome to ‘Out of Order’, the midnight snack for geeks of nostalgic film and TV memories from the days of yore. Tonight we’re returning to a random roulette of lost, destroyed, or unused media. Whether it be a million dollar tree house or an R-rated cut of a classic, lost media is gripping to look back on and spinning up wonders revolving around the whereabouts. Let’s not waste any more time with it, here’s volume two of lost media!
Case File I: Dr. Goldfoot and the Bikini Machine
Our Very Merry Espionage Christmas marathon continues next Thursday, but consider this segment a minor tidbit in the series as well. The roots for this film was concocted by American International Pictures, in particular it’s president James H. Nicholson. The studio was at the time best realized for their minimum effort beach party movies (literally based on teens hanging around the beach) and the truckload of schlock filler-ups by Roger Corman, but Nicholson desired to spread their range. Integrating elements from their Edgar Allen Poe features, their de facto beach party sentiment, and early James Bond hits such as Dr. No and Goldfinger, and Dr. Goldfoot and the Bikini Machine was born.
A special episode of Shindig! dedicated to the movie
However, not everything was exactly peachy keen during production. It has been made crystal clear in an interview that the mad scientist’s actor, horror icon Vincent Price, was more than disappointed when the camp musical style wasn’t apart of the final picture. In fact, it was a studio formula to have songs woven into their films, yet on a rewrite from Elwood Ullman it morphed instead into a light-hearted spy spoof with zero scenes of Mr. Price singing. It was a shame to him… the dream of a Little Shop of Horrors-esque experience was buried in the studio basements.
Susan Hart, another star of the American International Pictures alumni, said, “One of the best scenes I’ve seen on film was Vincent Price singing about the bikini machine – it was excellent. And I was told it was taken out because Sam Arkoff thought that {Price} looked to fey. But his character was fey! By taking that particular scene out, I believe they took the explanation and the meat out of the picture… it was a really unique explanatory scene and {Price} was beautiful in it, right on the money.”
I couldn’t have phrased it better if I tried, after all, I wasn’t there! The movie was still a success and earned a steady fan base thanks to its Mario Bava helmed sequel Dr. Goldfoot and the Girl Bombs, the title bit featuring Art Clokey and the Supremes, Price’s appearance, and the medley of in-jokes and humorous sexuality.
Case File II: Hard Times in the Pit of Despair
Nickelodeon; the world’s first kids network. That slogan featured for the growing channel in the late 80’s and early 90’s proved true, with the warm retrospectives on childhood usually including this network in the frame. It was a powerhouse. One of the programs popular on Nickelodeon was Legends of the Hidden Temple, which alongside the infamous Double Dare would victor as the leading game show for the young demographic. None of these episodes have been lost necessarily, but rather confiscated. According to info from web series host Kirk Fogg, a female contestant had been participating in the Temple Run when she began having a panic attack inside the so-called “Pit of Despair”. Ah, the irony.
Man, Nickelodeon has become a shadow of its former self…
The cameras eventually had to stop rolling after the contestant quickly became very ill and vomited on the set, and the crew were influenced to cheer said player up and tidy up the mess before they could resume with filming, also claimed by Fogg. Uncertainty seems to be inference the odd meltdown. As the episodes were done late at night, perhaps apt tiredness is the answer. Anything is possible though. Some of the mystery here is when it happened, too; Fogg as of 2020 has not explicitly noted the exact season, episode, or date of the incident. And on where the take is, it sort of goes without saying that it was shelved by Nickelodeon executives due to the unfitting nature. I would hope to chat with the contestant about the episode, but her name was not identified either. Under wraps indeed.
Don’t go anywhere, Out of Order will be right back!
Case File III: Kahuna, Tootsie, and Perry Mason Soap
I don’t mean actual hygiene related soap bars… case in point, there is in fact a genre of television serial called “soap operas”, which often run for decades, conclude each episode with a cliffhanger, and include over the top drama. Affairs, murders, and UFO sightings just happen every day in the soap opera fantasy (perhaps 2020 was a soap opera itself, like The Truman Show)! But back in the day networks didn’t have as much fine-tune material or the mindset to save shows, so let’s browse a threesome of lost soaps and see what could have been.
“Soap” was actually a soap opera parody, but close enough
Airing on NBC primarily in 1977, Big Hawaii only survived a single season run before being axed off the schedule. A soap set on the tropical islands sounds interesting enough, as I did enjoy five years of living there personally. Although I guess it simply didn’t get off the ground. Not much information on this one to be honest. All the food for thought we can chew on is that it centered on a Hawaiian ranch owned by the Fears family, it aired 9 episodes before cancellation (despite having 12 planned), and the only piece of remaining existence is Danger in Paradise, a feature-length pilot that aired during the summer. Danger in Paradise can be scourged for on the bootleg market online, but not much else.
With humble beginnings presented as a 15-minute companion serial to Guiding Light, Search for Tomorrow would run for a decent 35 seasons. However, evidence in the form of clips and stills is barely enough to commend its existence. I’m positive it must have, but still. From 1951 until 1968 Search for Tomorrow was always broadcast live before episodes began to be pre-recorded, though I’m not certain why because, like I said, not much evidence. A true gee whiz took place in 1983 when NBC, the show’s broadcaster, had lost all of the prepared episodes and thus the cast had to perform live once again. None of these so-called “lost” episodes have been dug up, leading to some rumors that it was all a publicity stunt. What do you think?
And lastly, we have the Midwestern police soap The Edge of Night. Most destroyed media remain as low-profile one-season whoppers like Big Hawaii, yet this series lasted for approximately 7,420 episodes! No jokes here. It premiered nearly sixty-five years ago in 1956, originally a moody detective serial that, due to creative differences with the channel, later clicked with the legacy of a moody soap opera deep fried in some Perry Mason elements. Even after three decades of episodes, the story had still not come full circle and ended it’s run on a cliffhanger. And as of today, thousands of The Edge of Night adventures have been long since cleaned from the tapes.
Case File IV: They Might Be Buttons
Our final lost media profile for tonight features the 2009 claymation film Coraline, directed by Henry Selick and hand-crafted by Laika. I adore both’s works on movies like The Nightmare before Christmas and Kubo and the Two Strings, and this picture was also rather good. The dark tale was based off an award-winning children’s book about a young girl who ventures into an alternate universe that soon becomes vile and twisted. You want to know another thing I have a fondness for? Answer: They Might be Giants. The duo of John Linnell and John Flansburgh form a dynamic formula of quirky music, such as the hits “Particle Man” and “Istanbul (Not Constantinople)”. Well, how about combining Selick’s dark storytelling with Linnell and Flansburgh’s whimsical style of music?
This was the best thing I could find. A tv spot starring the Other Father on piano.
Believe it or not, a colleague of TMBG, also named John, voiced Coraline’s father in this film. Rather, in the scene where the Other Father sings, he was instead voiced by Linnell. Very early, maybe even from the film’s conception, TMBG was recruited to write various songs for the movie. Later on down the road however, the crew of Coraline unfortunately didn’t feel the tunes were “creepy” enough for the film’s tone. Detailed in an interview, Burghman said that “we never really found a rhythm to work with them.” It’s a shame to watch a dream dissipate, but maybe the idea wasn’t all gone. Subsequently on their album The Else, the musical duo released a fraction of the Coraline sessions, a song titled “Careful What You Pack”. TMBG stated eventually that they hoped to release other pieces intended for the film on new albums, nevertheless it is unclear if any of them have seen the light of day, but judging from the interview it sounds like they certainly exist in one way or another.
Perhaps even a dark fantasy movie soundtrack could still be possible! Henry Selick, Coraline‘s director, stated: “They actually did some other demo songs that are brilliant, they are beautiful, but the film just kind of changed; it wasn’t going to become a musical. I was very happy to work with them and I’d love to work with them on another show where they have like ten songs in it. I’m wondering whether to convince them to write all new songs for… Yellow Submarine, or to just work with them and pick the ten best songs and see if I can find a way to string them together for a story.” That would be pretty unique, though no word on any sort of project like that has been leaked. Oh well…
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PASSENGERS WHO PUNCHED A TICKET
Adhdlifeforever
Todd
Simple Ula
Matt
Cnowak
Bob
Pono
Cathy
The Ebook Way
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Eric
Krissy
Saania Sparkle
Barb
Musicpoliticssports
Gary
Markgtr
Shelia
Jon
Ilene
Sumit
Sweta
Monica Bubblebath
Apostle Takim Quote
Stuart (Perditus)
Sweet and Nice Things
Lapiel
The Randomness of my Crazy Life
PatrickWhy
Mr. Blue
Mounzer
Phil (Perkins Designs)
Anees
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Mateo
Victoria
Eric Saretsky
ldw
Dr. Fawzy
Animation Flix
Captainforadayfoolforalifetime
Nurgul
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BuddingB
Vic (The Hinoeuma)
Delusional Bubble
HunterTheo
Max (Badfinger20)
Sam
James
Under5MinuteFilmFest
Educater34
All the Things I Could Do
Maureen
SecondTimeAroundHomestead
Tina
Lucy
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Sitting Pugs
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Wupples
Island Traveler
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Tia
Mattsnyder1970
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Samreen
Bernie
Pickvitaminhome
LaDonna
Cool Dump
Muthukumaran
Fenechost
10TopSites
Incubated the Movie
The Art of Blogging
Jordan
Eddie
Operation X
K at the Movies
Wretchedanddivine
Ash (previously Lucid Being)
Lemonshots
Chris
Mickawa
Thotaramani
K. Barnett
Video Game Review
Author M. Beyer
Unclearer
Colorful Sisters
Faiz
Mark Bierman
Chris and Susan
Thanks for tuning in!
MONDAY, FEBRUARY 1 | Updates for February and Shout-Outs
Lighttrain Reviews 